Heroine Sheiks: New York Hates Us

this lovely piece by the awesome holly day is not going to get to appear in this week's print issue because of space constraints, but it had to get out somewhere. i particularly like how it craps on new york. enjoy.

For nearly 15 years, local boy Shannon Selberg and his mighty Cows cut a swath through the heartland of America that left people quivering and quaking in their boots—and usually pretty damn inebriated. From the release of their 1987 Treehouse Records debut Taint Pluribus Taint Unum, and during their subsequent 7-year, 8-album relationship with Amphetamine Reptile, Selberg and crew created some of the most beautifully sloppy and hilariously frightening music this side of punk rock. Nothing was sacred so far as the Cows were concerned—farm animals, old women, school children and even various hygienic practices were all fair game, set to a stifling wash of loud guitars, static, machine-gun fire percussion (broken up by occasional unexplainable bangs and clatters) and, of course, Selberg’s fantastic bugle playing.

When the Cows called it quits after their 1996 release Whorn came out, Selberg relocated to New York and started up a new band, the Heroine Sheiks. Drawing heavily on the sound the Cows laid out near the end of their career, the Heroine Sheiks were a little tamer musically, but a lot more daring lyrically. Selberg’s Heroine Sheiks have been determined from Day One to rattle the cages of everyone from the mice to the clergy, and have done so, quite successfully.

“The Cows used to tour through New York, and this paper, The New York Press, they’d have us up on their weekly calendar of picks for the week, and they used to make a big point of making us a ‘pick’ so they could proceed to say how shitty we were,” says Selberg of his New York experience. “Like, the first thing we’d do in New York was to pick up the New York Press and read our shitty plug—I mean, it was obvious that the guy had never listened to our albums or anything like that, so it was really kind of funny.

“When I moved here to New York, I was working at this bookstore, and part of my duties were—okay, you know how you have to check in your backpack at the front door of some places? I was working bag check at this book store, and this guy comes in, and he’s like, ‘I’m with the New York Press,’ and we went and had a beer, and we had a really cool interview, and then, the music editor the New York Press got hold of it, and edited it to make me look like a pathetic, washed-up has-been who’s been reduced to checking ladies’ purses at a bookstore. And then they drew this really, hideous, ugly picture of me, like a cartoon, and obviously that guy’s never laid eyes on me, or even a picture of me! It was like, Jesus, welcome to fucking New York!”

And things just got colder. “We don’t get any press! Not even negative press! Recently, the Village Voice sent our publicist a note saying, ‘You don’t have to bother sending us any more releases from the Heroine Sheiks, because we will never review them or listen to them,’” says Selberg. “The New York Press did the same thing, but that’s because they’re just assholes. Back when we were just starting out, and we were packing the clubs up, and doing really good, and there were some hot shit bands that were actually opening for us that got hot shit press reviews everywhere, these papers would never even mention we existed. So I told the music editor, ‘Even if you hate us, at least we’re new! The guy from the Swans was in the fucking band, you know? Isn’t that at least news?’ And she got all pissed off at me for trying to tell her what to write. ‘If you don’t like it,’ she said, ‘just don’t read it. You’re an asshole!’ So I guess I’m an asshole.” He adds, “New York is a trendy kind of media center, so people only think you’re as good as you are talked about. To be playing on your third album, having been here for five or six years, and have that going on kind of stinks. But we’re doing all right.”

Despite the lack of NY critical acclaim, the Heroine Sheiks just keep plugging along, as can be heard in their most recent release, “Out of Africa” (Reptilian Records). “There’s actually a theory in anthropology called Out of Africa, where all modern people migrated out of Africa, and spread their culture all over the world,” explains Sleberg of the title. “The album’s indirectly about how America is a blend of America and Africa. I mean, America kind of thinks it’s the be-all and end-all of all culture, like, the whole world started with America. And say what you want about America, but everyone digs our culture. I mean, there are certain characteristics that even Americans say, ‘Hey, we’re winning the Cold War, because Russia has a McDonald’s, Coca-Cola, and blue jeans!’ It’s actually quite brilliant, the way America quietly took over the whole world without really firing a shot. All the wars and fighting hasn’t made nearly the impact on people that American culture itself has been making for decades. People who were formerly under Taliban rule are now letting their kids wear blue jeans and listen to hip-hop. We’ve pretty much won. So the album’s kind of an anthropology joke/political statement about imperialism.

“What I usually end up doing on albums is like, I get really experimental, and then the next one, I just put together what I’ve learned since working on that album, kind of expand what I know about what I’m trying to do with music?” explains Selberg. “And then the one after that is kind of an explosion of trying new stuff. And that’s what this one is: all the shit that I’ve ever wanted to do on the last record, and even those before, is on there.”

The Heroine Sheiks perform on Fri., Oct. 21 at the 7th St. Entry with Seawhores and Shotgun Monday. 8 p.m. 21+. $7.50 advance/ $9 door. For more info on the Heroine Sheiks, visit their official website at www.heroinesheiks.com. Head over to pulsetc.com to download an mp3 of their song “Pillow Talk.”